How to correct your child if he bullies other children
If your child bullies other children at school, don’t look the other way and put measures on the matter to fix it.
Bullying or intimidation is not for children nor should they fix it alone. Due to their age and poor maturity, they are not aware of the seriousness of the problem of bullying and the terrible consequences it can have. Stopping bullying is everyone’s business and in no case should you look elsewhere.
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CAN BE CONFUSING FOR PARENTS
It can be confusing to find out that your child is a bully. In fact, no parent wants to receive a call from the school or another parent and discover that their child is bullying other children … But the unfortunate thing is that it is very common today. Even the most excellent children or those who seem more ‘innocent’ at home can also get involved in bullying other children … so if you get this type of call, don’t get defensive and focus on finding the solution.
If you find out, try not to show surprise or disappointment, just take the necessary measures. Remember that there can be many reasons why one child bullies another. It may be due to social pressure from other peers, a reaction to having previously been the victim of bullying or bullying , an inability to control their impulses or anger or repeating patterns of what they see at home.
It is necessary to know what are the reasons that drive your child to attack others, because that way you will be able to find the most appropriate solution in each case. Bullying behaviors will not end unless the bullying child does not take responsibility for his actions, admits his mistakes, and learns how to change his behavior. Below you can learn how to help and correct your child’s behavior.
SOLUTIONS MUST BE APPLIED IMMEDIATELY
As soon as you know that your child is bullying others, you need to talk to him immediately. This will let them know that you are knowledgeable about the situation and that bullying is unacceptable in all cases. You do not have to list the consequences immediately but you should talk about the actions your child is taking, let him know that this situation must change as soon as possible.
DETERMINE THE ROOT CAUSE OF THE PROBLEM
To develop the correct discipline plan for your child, you will need to find out why your child has chosen to bully another. For example, if your child is a victim of bullying, you will have to deal with this, but also help him cope with the bullying he has suffered. If your child bullies because he wants to be part of a group and it is because of social pressure, he will have to learn to have healthy friendships and resist the social and toxic pressure of other peers.
But remember that this is not an excuse for their behavior, simply this information will give you the necessary ideas to tackle this problem.
BULLYING OTHERS IS A CHOICE
Remind your child that bullying others is a choice and that if they do it, it is because they want to. Each person is responsible for their own actions, so you must make sure that your child understands that they own their decisions and therefore must accept their responsibility. Keep talking about the situation until your child can communicate that he understands his responsibility.
APPLY LOGICAL CONSEQUENCES
The consequences must be adjusted to the magnitude of the events. If, for example, your child harasses others through the Internet, that is, by cyberbullying, then a logical consequence would be to lose all the privileges that have to do with the use of electronic devices. Every bullying situation is different and must be approached in a different and personalized way.
REMOVE PRIVILEGES
Losing privileges is a good way to discipline teens and is usually quite effective. For example, you can take away electronics use privileges, take away the privilege of hanging out with friends, using social media, or even taking away the ability to stay home alone. The list is endless and a must. Adjusting to the needs of the moment and the interests of your child.
The goal is to show that bullying behavior has consequences and will not be tolerated. Just make sure that once you withdraw something that you don’t give up later. Also be clear about how long the privilege will be revoked, for example removing a privilege 24 or 48 hours.
TEACH YOUR CHILD NEW SKILLS
You need to pay attention to your child’s bullying behavior. Perhaps there are skills your child lacks to prevent future bullying incidents such as impulse control, anger control, or managing emotions when they are overwhelmed. If your child intimidates others for attracting attention, it is most likely that he has self-esteem problems and you will have to work on the bullying that he generates in others with techniques to enhance his self-esteem.
Help your child see his worth and that of others. Your child needs to learn to create new healthy friendships that provide emotional well-being and comfort … and not the other way around.
DON’T EMBARRASS YOUR SON
As intolerable as bullying is, avoid embarrassing or labeling your child as a bully because then you will only make things worse. There are parents who use bullying images of their children to embarrass them on social networks and this is by no means a useful discipline strategy. With these kinds of uneducational strategies, children only learn that shaming and humiliating others is okay and that they can do it. Furthermore, shame is a form of psychological aggression and should not be used for discipline.
WORK ON EMPATHY FROM HOME
You will need to talk about the consequences of bullying and make sure your child has enough time to think about how the other person being bullied feels. When children learn to see things from another perspective, they are less likely to bully again in the future. It is necessary to work on emotional intelligence and get involved in working on empathy to prevent bullying.
Dr. Tabriella Perivolaris, Sara's mother and fan of fashion, beauty, motherhood, among others, about the female universe. Since 2018 she has been working as a copywriter, always bringing to her articles a little of her experience and experience as a mother and woman.