Many parents currently do not mind sleeping with their children, but others may eventually prefer that their children sleep in their own rooms both to sleep better and to have more intimacy with the couple. Sleeping with children means kicks in the face and elbows in the middle of the night … and this is not good for a good quality of sleep.
If your child has gotten used to sleeping in your bed, you’ve probably noticed that breaking the habit isn’t easy. Whether your child refuses to fall asleep in his own bed or ends up crawling into your bed in the middle of the night, kids who don’t want to sleep alone can be very persistent. In the end they get what they want because the parents just want to rest well …
But if you are tired of your child sleeping in your bed and you want to regain space and privacy in your bedroom , here are some secrets to prevent the situation from lasting longer.
YOUR CHILD’S ROOM SHOULD BE VERY COMFORTABLE
Your child’s room should have a relaxing environment without the possibility of night fears. The idea of ’relaxing environment’ in each child can be very different. While one child may enjoy white background noise with a night light, another may want a stuffed animal, complete darkness, and total silence.
Experiment with different things to see what your child sleeps best with and relaxes sooner. Relieve any nighttime fears you may have to get you to sleep independently.
MAKE YOUR EXPECTATIONS CLEAR
Talk to your child about changing sleep habits ahead of time, and once you start don’t back down. You can say things like, ‘You’ve been sleeping in my bed every night since you were sick two weeks ago. Tonight you’re going to start sleeping in your bed again. ‘
If your child protests (which he will) show empathy by saying things like: ‘I know you’re scared to sleep just because you’re not used to it, but you can do it.’ Then make it clear that you expect your child to stay in bed all night.
MAYBE YOU NEED A LITTLE HELP
If your child has been sleeping in your bed for a long time (even since he was born), then he will need a little more help to be able to make a good transition to his bed. You will have to create a step-by-step plan, with praise and rewards that helps your child become more independent, but little by little.
For example, you can tell your child that he can sleep in your room , but only on a mattress on the floor and once a week. Or, you can sleep in his room with him until he feels a little more comfortable (without making this situation too long). Then slowly make him sleep alone in his bed.
GET INTO A BEDTIME ROUTINE
Routines are necessary for children to have good bedtime habits and will also help them relax and get ready for sleep. A bath, pajamas, dinner, a story and many pampering are enough for a child to relax before going to bed with all the peace of mind that nothing will happen to him and that his parents are on the other side of the wall for if you need them for anything.
After routines, put your child in bed and leave the room so he can practice falling asleep alone.
While many parents constantly want to put a child to bed when they sneak into their room at night, they are often too tired or frustrated to be consistent. But if you want your child to stop sleeping in your bed, you must send a clear and consistent message every night.
If your child sees that your persistence and protests are effective, it will teach him that he can manipulate you with bad behavior. Be consistent when putting your child to bed, and don’t make exceptions that say they may sleep in their bed because they are tired or because they had a rough day. Sending mixed or confusing messages will only prolong the problem.