How can your children know that you are proud of them?
Here’s how your kids can know you’re proud of them without getting arrogant.
Children need to know that we are proud of them while being taught to be humble and modest in their accomplishments. Parents need to know how to do it because it has a delicate balance. Few expressions of praise leave children feeling bad, but too many expressions of praise can cause them to become arrogant.
Striking the balance in finding the appropriate praise and expressions of pride in children’s accomplishments can be quite difficult. These tips can help you find the right approach to praise and appropriate expressions of pride in a child’s efforts and accomplishments.
Index
PRAISE FOR THE THINGS THAT MATTER
Children do things all the time and some things are more important than others. For example, if a child is playing a piece of music on the piano and has really worked hard to get it right, it will take an adult to praise him for it. On the other hand, if you have not made an effort and that is why it has gone wrong, then you should not praise something that you do not deserve.
PRAISE THE EFFORT
The process and effort must be taken into account. Don’t just praise your child for passing a test or getting a trophy. What really matters is the effort and not so much the goal or the result. Being proud of a child for his efforts is much more important than just being proud of his achievements. If not, your children may feel that the result is the only thing that matters and it will not be difficult for them to cheat to show that they are the best.
On the other hand, if you praise the effort, not only will he feel lucky to have won or approved if he succeeds, but he will feel real personal satisfaction in the achievement.
TALK ABOUT OBSTACLES
Obstacles must always be overcome to achieve good results. When children achieve something in their lives, they have often had to overcome obstacles or difficulties in the process. Maybe they had to sacrifice some things like spending time with friends to practice or hone their skills.
Maybe they had some early losses in the competition that taught them areas for improvement. When we express pride not only in their accomplishment but also acknowledge what they had to overcome in the process, so you can see how long we have observed and how much attention we pay to their efforts on a daily basis.
DO NOT EXAGGERATE
Keeping expressions of pride in context is important. Children have an innate sense of proportion when it comes to their lives. Scoring your first points in a soccer game deserves attention and focus, but it’s probably not the kind of achievement that justifies a big neighborhood party. Having a small family event (maybe eating pizza or ice cream) and a good conversation with the family about achieving personal goals would be more appropriate.
CHOOSE THE RIGHT MOMENT
Compliments are best offered and received best when they are close to achievement. The closeness to the event and the recognition make everything even more meaningful for the child. In this sense, if your child has had an achievement, the ideal is to praise and celebrate near the event.
ENCOURAGE YOUR CHILD TO RECOGNIZE THE EFFORTS OF OTHERS
A good way to keep children humble while still acknowledging their accomplishments is to help them see how others contributed to their success. For example, if a child passed an exam, it is a good idea for them to realize that in addition to their efforts, others also helped them, such as the teacher, yourself, the teacher of reinforcement classes, the classmates who explained the concepts that they did not understand. , etc. A thank you note to a tutoring teacher is a good start to working on this kind of value. Helping the child see that there are many who are working toward his or her success will help him feel good about his own achievement and at the same time see that it is almost always a team effort.
Dr. Tabriella Perivolaris, Sara's mother and fan of fashion, beauty, motherhood, among others, about the female universe. Since 2018 she has been working as a copywriter, always bringing to her articles a little of her experience and experience as a mother and woman.