There is no greater pain for anyone than knowing that a mother is dying, that she is ill, and that little can be done to save her life. This situation is really traumatic and can negatively affect the life and personality of the adolescent who is about to lose his mother.
Words of comfort may be received as empty and they just think that life is meaningless. If you know a teenager who has a dying mother, what can you do to help him no matter how little it is? We tell you what you can do to try to give him that support that he so badly needs right now.
WHEN A MOTHER IS DYING
A teenager whose mother (or father) is dying may experience a wide range of emotions, from intense sadness to relief that his mother’s pain will end. Surrounding a grieving teenager with love and support can help you rebuild your life and create stronger relationships with friends and family. Loved ones can do a lot to help a teenager struggling with pain.
TALK ABOUT THE DYING MOTHER
Talk about the dying mother or father with the adolescent and say something like, “I am so sorry about your mother. She is a very kind and funny woman .” While some may worry that talking about a dying mother or father will cause more pain, it can actually be a stressful outlet for teens.
LET HIM SPEAK AND EXPLAIN HOW HE FEELS
Give your teenager a chance to talk too. If your attempts to start a conversation are ignored or dismissed, it may not be the right time to talk about his dying mother. If he’s willing to talk, listen to him and ask him if he wants any advice or help. Offering help to write a compliment, for example, can be a kind gesture that will be remembered for a lifetime.
HELP WITH SOME HOMEWORK
Mowing the lawn, shoveling snow, caring for pets, or reaching out to your teen’s school for homework – these are all welcome stress- relieving gestures for your teen’s home . Before doing anything it is best that you ask the family first and can offer suggestions for any tasks that need to be completed.
PREPARE GOOD THINGS
Make a favorite dessert or bring your teen’s favorite books; Kind acts can go a long way in supporting a grieving teenager.
LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU WILL BE BY HIS SIDE IF HE NEEDS YOU
Tell the grieving teenager something like, “I’ll be here if you need me. I’ll call you back in a few days, but if you want to talk to me, you can do it as soon as you need it.” Know when to keep your distance, but watch out for any signs that a teen may need additional help, such as mentioning self-harm. Recommending a grief therapist to the teen’s parents can help them find comfort .
HEAR WHAT YOU NEED
Listen to the wishes of the teenager. Maybe she doesn’t want anyone else to know that her mother is dying, and if so, you will have to respect that wish so she can trust you. Knowing that you are a trustworthy person can help him better cope with the impending loss because he will know that he can count on you whenever he needs it.
SPEND MOMENTS TOGETHER
For moments together with the adolescent and with his mother because in this way he will be kept in the memory forever. The time is money and now more than ever. It is important to try to make the days count and add to the adolescent’s heart. These are difficult times and when you must bear the loss there will still be more difficult times to overcome.