Your child should have consequences for misbehavior
The consequences that you apply to your children for their misbehavior must be correct and above all, consistent.
Has your child ever had a bad behavior and you didn’t really know what you should do to improve his behavior and get him to focus on what he was doing? When this happens you can feel a great helplessness not knowing which path to choose in raising your children. In reality, when a child misbehaves and knows what the established rules are that he must follow, he must have consequences for his misbehavior.
But not all consequences are valid, moreover, there are some that should cease to exist as any consequence that has to do with disrespect, humiliation or any type of violence, whether physical or verbal. Before applying the consequences in the education of a child, it is important that he / she knows what are the rules to follow and what are the consequences of not complying with them.
Index
THE MOST EFFECTIVE NEGATIVE CONSEQUENCES
You may be wondering what the most effective consequences for a child can be. In reality, each child is a world and what works for one may not be the most effective for another. In this sense, it is necessary that you know your children well and that you know what is best for each of them. But above all, even more important is to be consistent in the application of consequences , because if you threaten but then do not comply with the established consequences, your children will learn that they should not take you seriously.
-Wait time. Time-out works best for children under the age of 8. If your child refuses to pass the time out, or will not stay in time out, do not force it. Instead, take away a privilege. So next time you may prefer to be in the waiting time.
-Remove privileges. Take away electronics, a favorite toy, or an activity that he likes to do. Just make sure you don’t take those privileges off for too long, 24 hours is fine. If you take them away for a long time your child may give up or it can be made worse if you take away too many privileges or take them away for days or weeks.
-Return. If your child’s misbehavior affects someone else, restitution can be a good tool. You will have to tell him to do a task for that person he has hurt or to lend him his favorite toy to redeem his mistake.
-Logical consequences. Give your child the opportunity to take responsibility for his behavior. If he paints the walls, have him wash them. If he breaks something, make him pay to fix it.
Don’t be discouraged if your child’s behavior seems to get a little worse before it gets better. When you start giving consequences , a child out of control will reject it. Once he sees that you are serious and that you are consistent with the consequences and their compliance, then your child’s behavior will likely calm down and the misbehavior will disappear.
INCENTIVES ALSO HELP IMPROVE
If your child is not very motivated to follow the rules, you may need some incentive to change course for the better. Use positive reinforcement to motivate your children to follow the rules when you see them start to lose control. If you do not know what incentives can be good options, do not lose detail:
-Compliments. When your child does good things tell him things like you appreciate what he is doing. Positive attention can be very helpful in motivating children to maintain good behavior.
-Reward good behavior (surprise). With a scorecard you can redirect specific behavior or make a behavior chart to track various behaviors throughout the week, tangible rewards can lead to behavior change. Keep in mind that there are many free and low-cost rewards that work as good motivators. Going out for ice cream or buying a small treat or treat works great.
-System of token economy. Show your child that privileges must be earned (like playing video games or playing in the park). Establish a token economy system that allows your child to ‘cash in’ for their earned privileges.
If the strategies don’t work after all, then don’t hesitate to seek professional help for family counseling. You can start by talking to your pediatrician and having him refer you to the appropriate specialist. Thus the professional will provide you with the necessary tools for the education of your child.
Dr. Tabriella Perivolaris, Sara's mother and fan of fashion, beauty, motherhood, among others, about the female universe. Since 2018 she has been working as a copywriter, always bringing to her articles a little of her experience and experience as a mother and woman.