Perhaps the word ‘monster’ is too strong, but in reality a child, adolescent or adult who is unable to control his anger can become a danger to himself and others. For this reason, it is necessary for parents to focus on the education of their children and how they can help them to recognize and identify all their emotions.
When a child is two years old and does not know how to express their emotions, they usually have quite a few tantrums because of their frustration, this is normal and good for their development, but it is crucial that at this time they begin to work with the children on the management of the emotions, according to your ability to understand.
HELPS PUT EMOTIONS INTO WORDS
For a child to begin to control their emotions, it is necessary for them to be able to name them through words. They must learn to say why they feel sad, angry, or upset. In this way you will prevent him from becoming a person who raises his voice at the minimum of change. There are men who yell at women and other people, who create an intimidating environment where women do not feel comfortable expressing their ideas, let alone feel valued because they lack respect and dignity. It is important that all children learn to control their anger so that they do not become ‘monsters’ in the future.
There is little emotional difference between boys and girls. Both have the same capacity for sadness, both cry with the same frequency and even for the same reasons. This seems to change as children reach preschool age because of how adults react to their crying or frustration. Tears suddenly become a sign of weakness, it seems that crying is only for girls, while boys begin to learn that they should not show weakness … Great social error, because when this happens, aggressiveness and aggression begin. go to.
Boys are taught early on that aggression is acceptable: girls are given dolls and taught to be compassionate and sensitive, while boys are given action figures with guns to play with. All toys are educational, and these toys educate children about what is acceptable behavior in society.
Then there is what is reinforced as parents, often unconsciously, with language and gender biases. ‘Stop acting like a girl’ is often said to children. But boys and girls can act the same and feel the same way. Boys and girls need to learn equally, what emotions are, what they are for and what they say to them at a given moment.
ANGER IN SOCIETY
How anger is expressed is a product of socialization, not DNA. This continues into adolescence: the adolescent who knocks on doors does not do so simply because of the hormones of this stage, but because anger is the way he has learned to handle stress. We don’t really prepare children to deal with stress in a real productive way, other than through aggression, especially children, it seems that aggression solves everything, that the most aggressive person always wins … see in politics and day to day, unfortunately.
Women become interchangeable because boys learn in subtle and open ways to treat girls as objects, things of lesser value. There’s the coach who tells a male player that he plays like a girl, the guy who asks his preschool nephew about his ‘girlfriend’, as if girls can only be romantic conquests, not just friends or equals.
The attitude that women are there to absorb the pent-up frustrations of men begins at home and on the school ladder, but it does not end there. Follow both genders in peer groups, in relationships, in the workplace. In the same way that men are told to swallow pain, women are commanded to absorb the expression of men’s pain … And this is a social bomb about to explode.
TEACH VOCABULARY TO TALK ABOUT WHAT FRUSTRATES THEM
The good news is that there are ways that, as parents , children can be diverted from gender norms leading to misogyny. Since anger is often an expression of frustration, we must give children a good vocabulary so that they are able to say what frustrates them. We can ask them if they feel sad, hurt, or disappointed. We can tell them that it is okay to be afraid.
We can also teach them to deal with their frustration in the same way that it is healthy for adults to feel distress and process their emotions : talk with your children, do breathing exercises, meditation, write what happens, work on emotion management techniques, etc. It is especially important for fathers and other male figures to encourage this safe space for boys by showing them that vulnerability is not something to be ashamed of.
It is the duty of parents, educational figures and society in general, that the next generations become balanced adults , where there is gender equality, where work with emotions is essential. Only in this way will children learn to deal with the emotions that make them feel worse and that in this way they realize that aggressiveness or anger are not always the best way to go. Both boys and girls must understand that they have the strength, courage and capacity to have critical thinking,that they can say what they think without hurting others and that neither men are superior to women nor women superior to men. This society needs Emotional Intelligence and this must be taught from the time children are young, from the heart of the home.