How to talk to your partner about creating a family
If you want to create a family and you don’t know how to approach the subject with your partner … We help you with these tips.
Maybe you have known for a long time that you want to be a mother and that starting a family is a part that has to be in your future. Or maybe it was a more recent decision because you have discovered that your partner is the ideal person and you feel that having a baby with him / her is something magical and very romantic that you want to do.
Having the conversation about having children can be difficult and complicated. They may ask you that if the other person has not said anything about the subject, it may be that they do not feel safe about it. There are so many emotions that go into this topic that it can be difficult to know the best way to approach it. The good news is that if that person really loves you, then it is an important topic that you will have to address sooner or later. Next we are going to give you some tips so that you can talk about this topic with your partner and that it does not end in conflict.
Index
FIND THE RIGHT TIME
To know when is the right time you will have to know when is NOT the right time. The situations to avoid will be: in family gatherings, at a farewell, before a trip or when you feel stress of any kind. Telling your partner that you want to have children can be chaotic so it is necessary to find the right time.
Perhaps the best time is while you have breakfast on a Sunday morning or when you are relaxing on a summer night . It could be any time, as long as it is a quiet and relaxed time. What you have to remember is that you are calm walking or sitting. It is the only way to make sure that the two of you are listening to what the other has to say.
DON’T GIVE AN ULTIMATUM
When you want to talk about starting a family , you don’t want to give an ultimatum. You don’t want to say things like: “If you don’t want to have children, we are done” or “You haven’t told me you want to have children so I can imagine you don’t want to have them.” Saying these things will only end up having a fight … and this is not what you are looking for.
When you want to talk to him about starting a family, start with how he feels. Tell him that this is something you’ve been thinking about for a while and that it’s something that you care a lot about. Whether you want one child or a few, this is the time to drop it all and be super honest and open.
You don’t want them to feel like you’re angry before they’ve said something or are looking for an argument. People feel very convinced about this subject, and it is better to keep things calm and in a polite way.
SAY WHAT YOU WANT BUT LEAVE ROOM FOR A COMPROMISE
You want three or four children because you grew up in a big family or you just always dreamed of having many children. Your fiancé, on the other hand, thinks that having a child is the best plan. He thinks it will work better with his finances and it makes more sense since you both want to keep working.
Tell him what you want, but leave room for compromise because it is not a good idea to insist on having three children when your fiancé is more comfortable with having one. You both deserve to talk about your feelings and opinions, but no one should force the other to do anything.
TALK ABOUT WHY IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA.
Yes, you know that children are very cute . You may already have many children in your life, from a best friend who has become the mother of two children to a sister who has four young children. Or maybe your boyfriend or your fiancé has nieces or nephews and you love visiting them and playing with them. It’s best to sit down and talk about why having children of your own would be a good idea. Maybe you know the obvious reasons, like many people want to have a family of their own and want to be mothers or fathers, and you also know the reasons why people do not want to have children (such as wanting to travel or dedicate themselves to work).
If you feel that you want to have children because you want to have that experience with him and because you know that it would be something that you would regret not having done, this is the time to raise it. He’ll appreciate hearing your perspective and what you think, and he can tell you why he thinks it’s a good idea. Then both of you will be on the same path, which is definitely the goal of any serious discussion.
HOW TO DO IT
The last way to talk to him about starting a family? Make a game plan and make sure it’s realistic. Yes, they have both agreed that they want to have children, but that doesn’t mean it has to happen tomorrow (or next month or even next year). Maybe it makes sense to save some money and put things in order and think of a five-year plan. You might be ready to be a parent right now, and yet it doesn’t seem logical to do so because one of you wants to get a better job first or has other things to sort out first.
Once you have a plan in place, you can both breathe easier knowing that you are on the same path and that you are looking ahead with big smiles on both of your faces. When you want to start a family with the person you love, even just broaching the subject can be stressful. It is such an important topic that you always wonder where you can start. The best thing to do is stay calm and bring up the subject when the two of you are spending quality time together, and make sure the conversation doesn’t become a problem.
Once you are both on the same path about what you want for your future, then you will be glad you had that talk . After all, the decision about whether or not to have children is a very important decision that must be discussed at some specific time.
Dr. Tabriella Perivolaris, Sara's mother and fan of fashion, beauty, motherhood, among others, about the female universe. Since 2018 she has been working as a copywriter, always bringing to her articles a little of her experience and experience as a mother and woman.