What to do if my son says he is sick to avoid going to school?
How do you know that a child pretends to be sick so as not to go to school? What can we do?
” Mommy, my belly hurts .” ” Dad, my throat is sore .” In this way, children often tell us that they are sick and do not have enough strength to go to school. When a child is sick, the best thing to do is take him to the doctor and let him rest at home on the days that the specialist says. Not only because of the child’s illness itself, but also because at school he can end up infecting his classmates, and it is something that should be avoided whenever possible.
However, what if your child tells you that he is sick, and the doctor tells you that absolutely nothing is wrong? No signs of infection in his throat, nothing to suggest that he may actually be sick. But your son insists and insists. What can happen? You can find yourself in two different situations: either your child is really sick, or what he does is pretend not to go to school . It will be relatively easy to know which of the two circumstances you are facing if you put your child in a compromise. For example, propose plans that may seem irresistible but that his supposed illness prevents him from carrying out(like going to the amusement park, or to his favorite garden, or to the swimming pool), and wait to see how he reacts. If your first impulse is to be suddenly upbeat, you may be doing nothing more than pretending to be unwell so you don’t go to school.
If this happens, if you realize that your child is lying to you , do not go into a rage . You may not want to go to school for many different reasons; If he is still young, remember that he may have a hard time explaining what the problem is , or that he thinks you will not trust him. If they are older, try to ask them directly what is pretending, and try to get them to tell you the problem without further intermediaries. But sometimes it can be more complicated than meets the eye .
Index
REASONS A CHILD MIGHT PRETEND
That a child does not want to go to school is, to some extent, understandable. You may not like getting up early , or you may not like having to work in class. This is not a problem, all you have to do is explain in the best possible way all the benefits that the school will have in the long run in your education . If we impose school as an obligation, the children will end up rejecting it completely; and yes, it is an obligation, but it can also be very pleasant for them to go if we explain the positive of learning as much as possible. If they see that the school really gives them much more than it takes them away, they will understand that it is vital that they attend.
However, sometimes at school children face much more serious problems than having to study for certain hours in a row. And if your child begins to pretend an illness to avoid going to class, you may be facing one of those problems . In that case, it is essential that you understand that scolding and punishing him will not help; what you have to find out is why he is pretending, why is he not telling you what is wrong with him, what is he hiding. What is the real problem?
You may be suffering some type of harassment from your classmates, or other classmates. Perhaps they are bothering you for any reason, and that has reached such a point that it has made it impossible for the child to continue going to class normally. Bullying can end up causing anxiety, depression, and a host of mental disorders stemming from the trauma that bullying entails. Sometimes children are so scared that they don’t know how to copeand they find no other alternative than to pretend that they are unwell so that their parents will let them stay at home. If that is the case, you should go quickly to speak with the tutor, with the school board and with the parents of the rest of the students. You should even seriously consider filing a complaint; Even if they seem like drastic measures, it is the best thing you can do for your child.
It doesn’t have to be bullying from peers. Your child may not be comfortable with a teacher, and that causes him intense discomfort. In that case, what you should do is go talk to that particular teacher, and see how to manage the issue. The teacher is the adult, the professional, and he must be the one who makes all the pertinent decisions, always looking for the good of your child.
Ultimately, your child may feel like he’s not meeting the teachers’ expectations , or your own. Perhaps you have a school problem that does not allow you to perform at one hundred percent, and that makes you want to leave education early. If this is the case, take him to educators, eye doctors and all kinds of specialists to evaluate his abilities; you may not see well, and therefore you are unable to perform. Although it seems silly, not seeing well can end up causing concentration problems, and that ends up leading to school failure.
DISCOVER THE ORIGIN
There are many possibilities why a child could pretend to be sick so as not to have to go to school, but the important thing is that you know how to find out what the problem is , detect it and correct it. For that you will need high doses of patience, a lot of hand and knowing that the fault does not always have to be your son’s. This may be just a way of somatizing a problem you have and don’t know how to deal with. Instead of confronting him, try treating him with affection, finding out what the causes are and explaining how it can be solved without having to drop out of school. Emphasize everything you can do, such as going to a professional if he has a care problem, or changing his school if he does not feel comfortable in that one. It is not the end of the world, but you have to know how to act so that everything can continue normally. Remember: patience.
Dr. Tabriella Perivolaris, Sara's mother and fan of fashion, beauty, motherhood, among others, about the female universe. Since 2018 she has been working as a copywriter, always bringing to her articles a little of her experience and experience as a mother and woman.